Smegs is the RockDogs' sarcastic drummer, a real live wire who talks a blue streak and refuses to let anything get him down. Smegs has a natural charisma which gives him an amazing success rate with women - especially given that he never appears to go out of his way to court them. Unfortunately, the kind of women Smegs hooks up with usually want to control him and have a say in the band’s direction, so the other guys make sure to keep the girls away from him when they can. It's no easy task.

Smegs fancies himself as a songwriter, and while Zeke and Jamie write the bulk of the songs, he does have the occasional crack. Unfortunately, because of his obsessive-compulsive personality he gets tunnel vision while writing and his songs come out fixated on one particular thing - and it's never a good thing. Lately, he's had a run of bad luck writing songs about animals. Mainly different varieties of monkeys. Despite his lack of success, his manager Baz does see something there worth nurturing and encourages Smegs to write as often as he can - quite possibly working on the infinite monkeys/infinite typewriters/works of Shakespeare equation.

Smegs has only one abiding fear in his life - that his domineering harridan of a half-Italian, half-Greek mother will learn that he’s "wasting his life" in a band and isn’t in fact working at his uncle’s photocopying shop.